Thursday, September 3, 2015

Waiting.....

I feel like my entire life has been about waiting...
When I was 15 I couldn't WAIT to be 16 old enough to drive and freedom from my parents
At 16 I couldn't WAIT to be 18 move away to college and make a name for myself
When I got to college I couldn't WAIT to graduate
When I had my back surgery I couldn't WAIT to heal up
When I had my second back surgery I couldn't WAIT to feel my leg and walk normal again
When I broke up with a very toxic person I couldn't WAIT to go back to school
When I got back to school I couldn't WAIT to graduate
Since I've graduated I can't WAIT for my life to start..........

Yesterday I read this post from Chelsea and this post from Fal, and I realized that I wasn't the only one that gets stuck WAITING. I see everyone's post on facebook about getting engaged, getting married, having babies, buying houses and buying new cars. And it isn't always fun, I put on a smile and congratulate them, I cry at their weddings, hold their new babies, go look at their brand new homes, ride in their brand new cars all the while I'm just waiting. 

I thought graduating from college would offer a new world of things that I had been missing out on because I kept waiting, but really all I've been missing out on is life. 

I remind myself daily that it just isn't my turn yet, it isn't my season just yet, that doesn't mean it won't ever happen it just means that right now God knows more than I do what I am needing in my life. And it isn't an engagement heck at this point it isn't even a relationship, it isn't a new baby, it isn't a new house, it isn't a new car. I feel like he is teaching me to be happy in my current season.

However with that being said it still doesn't make any of this easier, at one point in my life I was reading the Bible every night before bed and I was building my faith and things in my life were going GREAT! Then I just stopped and things kind of started falling apart and I got anxious for so many things that I wasn't truly enjoying the season of my life. I wasn't thankful for the last few months and weeks that I was getting to spend with friends that had really become family to me over the last 2 years. 

But starting today, I am going to be more thankful for my current season because in all honesty they are just bad days, not a bad life. I am healthy, I have a job, I have a roof over my head, I have food in my refrigderator, I have a car that gets me where I need to go, I have a wonderful support system behind me, and I am loved by so many. 

And for those things I am thankful for this season of my life where God is teaching me so many things.......





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2 comments:

  1. Waiting for what's next is SO hard! I am working on being more gracious and not being so impatient!

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  2. Love, love, LOVE this post! I feel the same way dear. I too need to start being more thankful for my current season.

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